A CHECKLIST FOR RAMADHAN

1. Ask Allah to enable you to reach Ramadan and to get the most out of it as the Salaf (early generation of pious people) used to do. 

2. Intend to fast every day with Iman and pure intention seeking the reward from Allah alone. The Prophet peace be upon him said, “Whoever fasts in Ramadan with Iman and seeking reward (from Allah) his past sins will be forgiven”. (Bukhari) 

3. Read the whole Qur’an at least once as the Prophet peace be upon him did. 

4. Have Suhoor as the Prophet peace be upon him said, “Have Suhoor because it is blessed”.

5. Make Du’a during the fast because the Prophet peace be upon him said that three people’s supplication is not rejected one of them is the fasting person. Ask for the good of this life and the next for yourself, your family and Muslims in general.

6. Make Dua before opening the fast. The Prophet peace be upon him said, “The fasting person has a supplication that is answered when he opens his fast”.

7. Give Sadaqah and be good to people. The Prophet peace be upon him was the most generous of people and he was most generous in Ramadan.

8. Avoid anything that diminishes the fast such as, lying, backbiting, cheating, getting angry. The Prophet peace be upon him said “Whoever does not give up false statements (i.e. telling lies), and evil deeds, and speaking bad words to others, Allah is not in need of his (fasting) leaving his food and drink.” [Bukhari] 

9. Do not eat too much after Iftar.

10. Ask for forgiveness since this is the month Allah frees people from the fire.

11. Pray At-Tarawih with Khushoo. If you pray in the Masjid complete the Salah with the Imam. If you pray at home prolong the Salah as long as you can. The Prophet peace be upon him said, “Whoever prays during Ramadan with Iman and seeking reward (from Allah) his past sins will be forgiven”.

12. Feed the poor and invite others for Iftar. The Prophet peace be upon him said, “Whoever gives Iftar to someone fasting he will have the same reward without decreasing the reward of the person fasting”.

13. Try harder the last ten nights especially the odd nights. The prophet would strive in Ramadan more than he would in any other month and more so in the last ten days.

14. Say this Dua in the nights that Laitul-Qadr is likely to fall on: Allhumma innaka afuwun tuhibbul-afwa fa’fu anni (O Allah you are Forgiving and love forgiveness so forgive me).

15. Ask Allah to accept all your good actions during this month.

O you who believe, fasting is decreed for you, as it was decreed for those before you, that you may attain salvation. (Quran, 2:183)


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A LETTER TO MY LIFE

It is in the dead of the night and an endless train of thoughts gush in making the noises in my head unbearable forcing me to wake up and put them in writing. At this moment my mind is at liberty of making so many life plans and aspirations. In my head I can do anything and I can become anything. The level of my determination is untameable at this juncture. 

With optimism in abundance, my will to succeed is larger than life itself, with my hope bigger than the Taj Mahal, the career path all laid out like a treasure map to the promised land with detours of a few holiday stops and personal rewards here and there.Like an exotic food recipe my future is all spiced up with great plans of having a cool corner office and a booming career, a small beautiful family and a great life full laughter and happiness.

Just as I was picking the theme colour of my dream house, the dogs outside start barking and disrupt my wishful thinking… Oh! How I wish my wishful aspirations would come true relieving me of all time I spend desiring. I know I am not alone in this for everybody deep inside believes in wanting to do something and be somebody someday. The difference is that some of us just build castles in the air and it ends there whilst others are insatiably driven by the wishes to put them into reality.

Even the great Gandhi said “a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step”. Indeed it does because we all have to start somewhere. My biggest dream is to one day sit on this same spot and write about how I managed to make it all happen, how I managed to put my wishes into reality. And that day I will look back and afford to say the famous procedural tag line “it’s just like yesterday!”

I believe that God has set default destiny to everyone’s life however when it comes to us as individuals our lives are like a piece of cloth that we can tailor it to our liking by determination and faith. We only have wishes because we believe that one day they will come true.

Like any other young woman, I face so many hurdles and challenges in my journey but I take them as mere speed bumps to make sure I take the right turns and stop on the right spots. When I fall, I dust myself and get back up knowing better on how to avoid it next time. We all need something to hold on to when things are tough. Well, with me, my writings are my motivation.

I find solace when I share my thoughts in writing because they remind me where I come from and where I am going telling me I deserve to be where I am, it is okay to be wrong, it’s okay to not be perfect and it’s okay to lose sometimes. Losing motivation is like losing faith because only when you have a strong reason to do something will you be able to do it regardless of the setbacks you encounter.

At the start it may seem impossible and rejections may be inevitable. But I will not give up, I will not accept to be average and I will not give anyone the prerogative to bring me down and demean me. I know if God could get me here then I can go even further and even if I don't get there, at least I reached here! Thus I dare to be true to myself and accept nothing short of greatness as my destiny. 

From the most determined part of my heart, 

Yours truly, 

The Dreamer.

P.S 
I have dedicated my time to write this article as a special note to all my special friends and my good readers who have dreams and aspirations just like I do. 

BEING THE BIGGER PERSON

In any conflict there is always the wrong and the wronged one. Through our trials and tribulations in life, most of us have been through both situations. In any heated altercation there is that urge to retaliate just to make sure we have the last say and prove that we are right. Not everyone likes being on the losing end especially in arguments that are just alleged against them.

Indeed it hurts inside when allegations are lodged against you for something you have not done. The burning rage and anger may sometimes compel you to do things that you may regret greatly at a later time, especially when proving your innocence is next to impossible.

One of the strongest and best characters one can have is that mere ability to conquer one’s heart and be the bigger person in a conflict. People can be unfair to you, lodge allegations against you, try to point out all the wrong things you have ever done and forget the good in you. But this does not mean you have to go prove to the whole world that you are not that person.

I do not dispute the fact that such advice is easier said than actually done however, as human beings, we should always try to seek harmony at hard times by reminding each other on the things that make the world a better place.

The best portrait of yourself is what you paint in your head and not what other people think. Yes it matters in some aspects because we don’t live in a vacuum. We live in a society where such encounters are inevitable. The best way to deal with such challenges is first of all is to master the ability being able to accept who you are and dealing with it.

Sometimes people do or say things with the intention to hurt us and when we show them that we are angry and hurt they feel victorious since they will have managed to achieve what they intended to do. Thus the best way to deal with such situations is being the bigger person and apologise if need be or just walk away and keep quiet. Keeping quiet or walking away from an argument does not make you any less of the person you are but rather the stronger one who managed to halt the altercation. Being the bigger person often demonstrates your strength in character and personality.

As much as revenge would seem the best idea on people who hurt us, at times it only makes us the very people we despise. It is best to sometimes just let go and let them be. In reality such vile people are very weak at heart and only feel good by tarnishing others' images. Thus one should not give them the benefit of winning by stooping to their wicked level just because of vengeance. Don't let such little people capture your attention, sometimes ignoring them is the best vengeance you can ever offer them.

LEARNING TO LET GO

Love is not something you just decide to feel, it is a natural feeling that hits you when the time is right. When we are in love, the feeling is almost eternal in that we tend to think nothing can break us apart. The feelings are sometimes so strong they border on hate, resulting to endless arguments when our loved ones happen to do contrary to what we desire or expect. The heart is at its most fragile that with a slight misunderstanding, feelings can be triggered greatly.

We all have that one person we can be ourselves around, that one person we talk to about everything and anything without the fear of being judged. That one person you are comfortable to confront whenever you feel that things are not right. Arguments are healthy in a relationship; they spice up the relationship to cook up a perfect journey of two people who learn to live with each other through hard and good times. But we all know sometimes, too much of anything is harmful. When there are more of arguments than serenity it defeats the purpose of being in-love.

It is unfortunate that some differences are irreconcilable leaving the parties with no any other option than parting ways. Going through a break can be a very tough thing, this is because letting go of our past relationships is a difficult process overpowered by anger, guilt, fear of moving on and sometimes the fear of being alone. Despite all the different reasons, the hurt is the same.

Love should not be an annoying contest entailing constant fights because you never know when you are busy giving endless chances to that one person who constantly hurts you, there is someone out there yearning to please you. Love and respect should come as a package. You don’t love someone if you don’t respect their feelings. You only know someone is not worth of your time if they keep abusing the privilege of forgiveness from you constantly.   

It is easier said than done when people commonly tell each other “if you love me let me go” …of course I love you and that is why I don’t want to let you go! However, sometimes the best thing to do is to move on and forget about the past because that is where it belongs. Holding on to it is being unfair to yourself and those who are worthy of your time and affection. 

A note to remember: 

  We all have our battles to encounter but we only take up arms for the ones worth fighting for. 

THE LACK OF MOTIVATION IS LACK OF AMBITION

Have you ever experienced a situation where you totally lack the drive to go on with whatever you are doing whether it is school or work or just life in general? That unpleasant feeling where things have gotten so tough yet you have neither the drive nor the motivation to do whatever you are supposed to do!

The only option you have is to compose yourself and do it or otherwise you fail. Well, we all have that one thing in our hearts which gives us the drive to wake up in the morning and fulfil our purpose in life. There are however some who may not feel the same way since whatever or whoever the influence was, is no longer there thinking they have nothing to lose.

We ought to remember that just as everybody came alone in this world, so shall the exit be. At the end of the day your life is all about you. You may have a family that you love, friends who care about you, a partner who cannot live without but when it comes to your life, you should know that you stand alone because with a blink of an eye all that may vanish leaving you alone.

Growing up, my only challenge was to make my parents happy by excelling in everything. Since their happiness is my solace I did everything to make sure I achieved that, which also included working so hard in school and being good at what I do. 

As time progressed however,school life ended and despite having my loved ones on my side, life is no longer all about excelling in school and going home with that impressive report making my parents happy. Now I have to attend to more pressing matters than just that report card I always worked hard for. It was all too overwhelming to realize that now it is all about me as an individual and no longer as a family package attached to my parents. They did all that as a catalyst to bring out the best in me to shape up my future. It is now up to me and only me to be whatever I want to be in this life. Of course, God has his plans in store for us but he doesn't expect us to sit there and wait for that good job or that lifestyle of our dreams to fall from the sky.

The moral of my story is that before we start complaining that we lack the motivation and drive to do whatever we have to do to succeed we should remember that we are not living on behalf of somebody else. These are just mental role models to catalyse our pursuit to greatness. That opportunity you are wasting may be the only chance you have to be whatever you want to be in your life.

Note: 

 Lacking motivation is lacking ambition.